I’ve always tried to instil a sense of anything is possible with my 6 year old daughter Rose.
When she was around 3 years old all she wanted for xmas was a pack of disposable nappies for her dolls….easy right? I had bought her all kinds of other cool things and I kept thinking, “I must get her those nappies, cos it’s all she actually wanted”
Then I spotted them in a toy shop….£6 bloody pound for 3!!!!!!
I put them straight back on the shelf thinking I could buy a proper pack for that what a con, but then guilt, and shame, and embarrassment at my own money blocks hit me and I went back and bought them.
On Xmas day it was 100% her fav gift…and she managed to keep those nappies in play for well over a year, much to my amazement (perhaps she sensed their monetary value or the fact she wouldn’t be getting a second pack any time soon) so money well spent in fact.
It’s all about mindset and language, because she sure as hell doesn’t get everything she asks for. She wants a Big Sister LOL doll for xmas and has for the last 2 years and I have told her NO…ethically I don’t feel good spending £80 on a heap of plastic…and she has accepted that.
One day she came back from her dads weekend and we were talking about something or other and she said “Well, mum…want don’t get” it stopped me in my tracks because that isn’t a phrase we use.
Boy oh boy it was one I was brought up with though…as we never asked for things, cos we knew the answer…in fact when shopping with my Mum it was the warning we got as we entered every shop “Don’t ask for nothing” we learned growing up is that you got what you were given and you would be damn well grateful for it. If you wanted something over and above what mum could get for us, you had to be resourceful and get it yourself. Did you read my blog post about the game boy?
So how does this apply to you and your business?
It is absolutely OK to desire things in your life, it’s not greedy or selfish or wasteful, we shouldn’t have to curb our desires based on other people values, choices or money mindset. We get to choose. If you want to spend your money on high heels and handbags that’s 100% fine with me, and if you’d prefer to spend it on booze and fags, that’s all good too…building schools in third world countries, knock yourself out…its all good, no judgement here either way.
It’s your money.
But one thing I know for sure is being broke as a business owner helps nobody.
A lack of desire, or holding yourself back on being honest about what you want can often hold you back in life.
We don’t just have to be able to cover our costs, or make enough to cover our basic needs in life…why can’t we have more? Now I am not necessarily talking about consumerism or capitalism in their biggest sense, but just being able to say outloud…
- I want to be able to get regular hair cuts and not worry about it
- I want to be able to replace my laptop every 3-4 years if I need to
- I want to be able to buy in staff to help me grow
- I want to be able to travel for business and/or pleasure
- I want to work 4 days a week AND take the Summer off to spend with my kid (I am btw in 2020)
I know the clearer I have got on my desires, the more my business has grown, and the more my business grows the more impact I have on the world.
Yep, there is a direct correlation to my personal wealth and the impact I have on my clients…I ain’t no good to anyone broke trust me, been there done that…and it almost destroyed me.
Get clear on what you want and then get clear on how you might get it…but don’t focus too much on the how, as that can make you talk yourself out of it as it might seem too hard.
Sort out your mindset and the rest will fall into place.
Turn your need into want, your want into desire, and your desires into choice.
Empower yourself to choose the life you want.
PS. The photo for this blog post is me this morning after going to the hairdressers. I realised I was caught up in the “oh I only get it done when it needs doing” instead of an “I feel good when my hair is done, and I’m more likely to show up in my business, just get it done when you bloody want to”